NNWLA Article: Not Guilty – A Reflection for Mother’s Day

I recently authored a short article for the Northern Nevada Women Lawyers Association (NNWLA) May newsletter, which included several pieces about lawyer motherhood. I thought some OMARALICIOUS readers might enjoy it so I have included it below.

Mommy and Lucy in December 2010

Motherhood brings with it so many surprises.  Before Lucy was born last June I knew I would love her, but I was surprised by just how much I love her!  I knew returning from maternity leave would be difficult, but I was surprised at how it actually felt.  I thought I might feel guilty for returning to work, for liking my job, for not seeing my new role as a mother as some impediment to my career.  The cultural background noise told me to expect guilt.  But I didn’t feel guilty.  I felt many things that I imagine other working mothers (and working fathers) also feel when still counting a baby’s age in weeks: I felt tired from waking up every few hours to nurse and care for a needy infant, I felt busy from keeping up with deadlines, billable hours and professional networking while adjusting to the new reality of my home life, but I didn’t feel guilty (at least not about working, my housekeeping skills are another story).  For a day or two I even felt guilty about not feeling guilty!  And then I just got over it and turned my back on the cliché of working mother guilt.  Instead, I feel proud to be Lucy’s mother, including the working mother part. Of course it helps that I am lucky to have a very supportive husband and extended family who help us with Lucy’s care. But when I get home at night Lucy is smiling and happy, ready to give me one of her wet kisses and to play on the floor.  What’s there to feel guilty about?

Happy baby, helping contribute to the general messiness in the kitchen (April 2011)